So, I’ve never been one for New Years resolutions but this year may be different. I have had a lot of ups and downs over the last year and 2012 is a chance for me to start fresh. In 2011 my life changed completely. I thought it was changing forever but that didn’t end up being the case. I got engaged, changed my life and me for a man. He really was a great man but I just wasn’t the one for him. When he broke up with me I thought my world had ended. I have never cried so hard in my life probably, I did things I regret, I broke things, I thought all of my dreams had been ruined. I didn’t know how I was going to go on with my life. I had dreams for us and plans for our future and in a moments notice those were all gone. How could this happen to me, I thought? I am not this person. Things like this don’t happen to me. Silly to be so naive.
Now, 4 months later, I am stronger and I have grown a lot. Am I thankful for what happened? Probably can’t say yet that I am thankful for it but I am happy with where I’m at now. I’m happy with the person I am and how strong I am. I’m proud of myself and the home that I have made. I am so thankful for the friends and family that stood by me and supported me in my darkest moments. Some people may think that I don’t have a lot of friends or that I’m lonely because I don’t go out much. This is not true. I enjoy my alone time. I enjoy the few awesome friends that I have and my co-workers for putting up with me every day. I have friends hundreds of miles away that I wouldn’t change for the world. It’s amazing how someone so far can be so close to your heart. Thank you to everyone that has been supportive. Without you I don’t know where I would be.
So, the plan for 2012 is to work on me and to make sure that in the future I can be the best girlfriend/wife a guy could have. I will set higher standards and go for what I want. I won’t settle. I had a dream of a guy when I was growing up and that’s the guy I’m going for. Why can’t I have my dream guy? These days it’s hard to find the perfect person for you…but he’s out there somewhere. I know it. And until I find him, I’m perfectly fine with being alone. I’ve never been the girl that needs to have a man by her side all the time…that’s not me at all, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t hope for the right one to come along. 2012 will be a good year. If it brings new love, great. If not, that’s okay too! I’m looking forward to my future and doing things to make me happy and not worry so much about what others think. In the end, I need to make myself happy first before I can make someone else happy.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year — Make it a great one 🙂